My take on emotions, inspired by the Great Brenna

I read a recent blog post by my friend Brenna about her take on emotions and why they are veiwed as bad and why people are scared of them. Emotions are real and healthy. While reading this I thought about how I deal with emotions. I am generally happy and satisfied most of the time but still filled with an abundance of emotions everyday. My entire life has been an emotional roller coaster. When I was growing up I didn't express how I felt ever.... I was always the listener and the go to person even at age 8 I remember my parents coming to me with their problems. When I got to be a teenager I was very angry. I was angry with my parents, with my brother and with the world. I would burry that feeling as much as I could but would often have very explosive outbursts when I could no longer run from things. When things hurt the only way I knew how to deal with it was either hold it in or let it out violently. Which is completely opposite of how I handle things now. I feel we need all emotions I think feeling sad is good and I think feeling happy is good and I agree with my good friend that faking your way through life by holding back your emotions would be one miserable way to live. I love to cry every once in a while. Although I hate crying in public cause I hate sympathy and feel way too vulnerable when I cry. But a nice cry fest in the privacy of my room is always a good feeling. Now in my life as things of different nature approach me I do try and see the bright side of everything instead of looking at all the bad. I think it's good to see the bad and be aware of it but as for me I can't focus on it. I become very reckless when I do. Anger is an emotion that I no longer allow myself to feel. When something upsets me I disect it. I actually disect and analyze everything to see all sides of it.. Because anger I feel is very healthy for some it is very destructive for me. I hate the feeling of anger it feels so out of control and just icky to me. I think it is so beautiful that we are all different. I love that we all deal with things differently and I believe that we should all not be afraid of who we really are not hide from it or run away. I realize I may sound hypercritical after saying I refuse to feel anger anymore then saying be who you are lol I wish to clarify that I no longer am tempted to feel angry it is an emotion I don't have any more. Ok so time to time I get frustrated but it's not the raw uncontrolable anger that I used to feel. And I actually enjoy being frustrated sometimes because it motivates me to change something. But back to anger because of the way I veiw things now anger never comes to light.I just don't let things effect me I realize that I have a choice on how I deal with them. And if I'm sad about something it's because I choose to feel that away but I take my time and am sad about it then move on.. And because of my way of dealing with things I find myself more in a happy state most of the time. But sometimes I want to be down about things or sad I like feeling different ways it makes me feel alive. But if there were a world full of happy go lucky people I think I'd take them all out lol how miserable would that be... Lately since getting into blogging and stalking others I have been able to see the insides and inter workings of others. It has made me fall in love with them. And recently others have opened up to me and allowed me to see sides I never have seen before. And Im just amazed at how beautiful they are and the dominant traits they have. It helps me realizes triats that I wish to develope more. I guess it's glorify and pick on Brenna night but how honest she is with not only everyone but with herself is just amazing. She doesn't seem to be afraid of herself one bit and that is a rare trait that I haven't seen in many people. Alot of people I think try to fit themselves into a mold to make others happy or to get noticed. But not Brenna she is who she is and thats all she trys to be and I love her for it. Then theres my brother who I've looked at lately in a different light. He has had many struggles in his life and I believe he still does but the beautiful thing about him is that even though he stumbles from time to time he never gives up he just keeps trying harder and harder. Then theres my best friend Rhett McDermott oh Mr McDermott. He is one of the most beautiful guys I know. I call him an alien because he is unlike anyone on this planet. He's always so positive and realistic at the same time. He encourages me to try new things and has been a rock for me through many hard times. He pocesses a different way of loving people. He's not one that is full of compliments he's rather quite when it comes to how he feels vocally. But his actions and his charachter show love so well. He is remarkable. It's really hard for me to describe all of his attributes that I love because there is so many. I love his honestly and integrity. Sometimes he is brutally honest and I LOVE IT! Lol so Ive been around the world with this post... I have felt like pooh all day because I have poison ivy taking over my body again. For most people they just get itchy but for me I get itchy and I feel awful, I have a fever and body chills with it and lose all energy it sucks... When I went into work this morning both of the Docs looked at me and said what is wrong with your face lol. Made me feel a little bit more like a pod person.. Then about noon this little girl came into my office and asked if she could tell me something I said sure and she said you are very pretty... That made me feel like a unique pod person lol.. I love kids.. So after feeling like pooh it's good just to sit back and let the thoughts and feelings flow... As for now I think I'm off to stare at the back of my eyelids for 8 hours!