I have very vivid dreams almost nightly. Sometimes they are very realistic and sometimes I'm riding a turtle through the skies. I love to dream and I love my dreams they are so fun. For a while every time I dreamed a friend of mine Brenna was in them and in each one I was doing something dumb and she was making sure I knew it was dumb, except for one time you broke out in song and dance lol. I used to dream all the time about another friend of mine Rhett too, rainbows, people who did nothing but try on hats, being the number one boxer in the world with a booty like Jlo. My favorites are the man in the bunny suite, for about 2 months I dreamed various dreams about a man in a pink bunny suite. Normally my dreams vary and are extremely random. But every year about this time my dreams change and are only about 2 things. My Parents. It happens every June, I mean it happens through out the year as well but not nearly as much. Every since this month began I've constantly dreamed of them. It makes me miss them more then ever. Some of the dreams are so real and I wake up wanting to call them. Their personalities are normally exact in them, my mom is always so caring and protecting. My dad is always a free spirit getting into trouble. This is the month that both of my parents passed away, I'm guessing that's where the dreams come from. I think our minds and bodies remember traumatic events so vividly so anniversaries are very painful. I wake up thinking that I will see them like their deaths was the actual nightmare. I used to be very hard on myself when I'd get sad during this time, because of the Plan Of Salvation I know I will see them again and I have a great understanding of death and the Lords plan, I was hard on myself because I do know this and I thought my sadness and pain was me lacking faith. But I've learned over the years it's not a lack of faith I still know with all of my heart that we are sealed together by the power of God and that seal is eternal with no end! So it's not a lack of faith it's just me missing them, it is not a weakness, I'd worry more if this didn't happen. The dreams used to destroy me, I must admit they still make me sad but it's a time I feel close to them. The other time I feel close to them is when I attend the temple. The gospel of Jesus Christ has been my rock 5 years now. The truth is so powerful and so comforting. I know without a knowledge of my Savior and Heavenly Father and other eternal truths surviving this world would be very hard sometimes. But with it I find delight in the hard times because I can always ALWAYS see the light at the end of the tunnel. I see the bigger picture and know what is to come and I know that I can over come and move forward through EVERYTHING. I'm thankful for the atonement. To know he felt how I feel right now, He is the one that completely understands me.
Even though this is a month that brings back memories of 2 very hard years I'M GOING TO ROCK THIS MONTH. I'm going to remember them, and I'm going to keep trying my best to do my best so I can see them again. I also know because of my experience I can help others who have and will go through the same thing understand the comforting truth as I do. I'm going to keep wearing a smile on my face and in my heart. I am very happy. I really have so much more then I don't have. The Lord has blessed me greatly.
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